The step before the jump

This post is about all the crazy, wild, & beautiful things that happened in training camp, domestic ministry, and debrief! This month and a half of preparation was such a sweet season of learning, growing, changing, healing, and getting ready to be sent out to the nations. The Lord truly tested me in the midst of this season. I never knew how intimate my relationship with Jesus could be. Saying goodbye to my family absolutely broke my heart, and made me question whether or not I should be here. But in those moments of sadness, Jesus reminded me that I was here for a reason. When I started questioning things and was confused on what I was learning and what I knew, Jesus reminded me that He was close and He was teaching me to trust in His word and His word alone. When I got sick and was so frustrated that I didn’t feel well, Jesus reminded me that He was as close as my next breath. Every moment that I struggled throughout training camp, every moment of anxiety, fear, sadness, anger, and pain, Jesus taught me bits and pieces of who He is and what he has for me in this season. He showed up to me in ways that I could never imagine. It was so tangibly evident that I am here for a purpose and a calling that He had placed over my life long before I was born. Moving out of training camp, girls from both of the Gap year trips drove down to Harlem Heights, and began domestic ministry in that community. It was an interesting time of using the things we had spent a month learning about and actually getting to apply it to real life ministry. While being in Florida, my team and I helped restore houses that had been affected by hurricane Ian. We spent most of our time painting, which seemed like a fun and mindless task at first. As the days went on, it got hard to stare at a wall and paint all day, every day. I learned quickly how important quality time with my team is. That in order to work well together, we have to spend time together apart from ministry. Communication became a lesson that we learned quickly and luckily we grew so unbelievably close that quality time is now a daily routine for us. We also learned how to work at a pace of peace. Being the hands and feet of Jesus is so important, but it should be at a pace that doesn’t put the physical work over the spiritual purpose. After our time in Florida, we arrived back in Georgia for one final week of debrief before leaving the country. Debrief was sweet, relaxing, and so valuable. It was a full week of last minute preparing, meetings with coaches and leaders. That week I learned the importance of resting in the presence of the Lord. The only way to truly debrief from an event or a trip, is to spend your time with the Lord. In that week, so many tears were shed as I said my goodbyes to my friends, my boyfriend, and the beautiful season that being in Georgia brought. In the midst of that heartbreaking transition, the Lord reminded me that as I was learning to rest in him, He also wanted to be my comfort. I craved the comfort of my friends, family, boyfriend etc. But in that craving, each person I went to for comfort led me back to the same conclusion, that the author of creation, the king of the world, wants to sit with me in my tears and comfort me in my sorrows. Psalms 56:8-11 says,
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. My enemies will retreat when I call to you for help. This I know: God is on my side! I praise God for what he has promised; yes, I praise the Lord for what he has promised. I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?”.
God has been so good, so faithful, and so comforting in this season of life. As I am writing this, I am already in Cambodia. But throughout the challenges that I have faced, and will face abroad. I know that the Lord has my hand and heart through each and every moment. That when I trust in him, nothing else matters. I have committed these next 7 months to God and His plan for me, and I am so genuinely excited to see what will come next for me. Thank you so much to everyone who has been following along and donating, and praying over my trip. More updates will be coming soon! May the Lord bless you and keep you, may His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you.
Love, Lily Kincaid